I Revisit Memory, and Regret Every One of my Interactions

Mary Szybist sat next to me,
eating salad, and talking about
“Big Lebowski”.
I was shocked that she enjoyed it,
and she compared it to Faulkner.

If I could go back, I’d revise my answers. I would tell her that I
loved “A Rose for Emily”, and that it’s not the whole of the movie,
but the character Walter.

Sure, I didn’t like it that my husband
chose a movie that seemed to drag,
but it was interesting to think
about how it was similar to Faulkner.
I think about similarities to plot,
wondering if I can make more connections.

I would have asked you why you liked it,
instead I was so concerned about looking fat, letting myself be consumed from within,
and I could have learned the answers
to the questions eating at me now.

I wish I were better at speaking.
Honestly, there was so much I wanted to ask you. I would have asked about
my favorite poem by you, and maybe
asked what other films
are literary in disguise.

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